You’re planning your wedding day.
Wedding planner. Check.
So much to do, right? But have you given any thought to your actual ceremony? Are you aware of the choices you have available to you in the UK? There are alternatives to having a church wedding or a registrar-led service. You can opt, instead, to do a ‘registration only’ at your local register office (no need for rings or vows), and then have the ceremony of your dreams with a chosen celebrant anywhere and at any time. You are not restricted if you choose a celebrant to create your wedding ceremony, and most importantly of all it will be written especially for you. A registrar does not write wedding ceremonies. To perform their ‘service’, they use a government-supplied script as a one-size-fits-all for all their marriages. Where’s the romance in that?
As an independent celebrant who creates personalised ceremonies especially for each couple, my job is to create beautiful experiences that you will long cherish. This means I take the time to get to know you (which can be in person or by Skype, depending on where you live), and learn about your love story. I visit the chosen venue to go through a rehearsal with you, too. A registrar doesn’t do these things.
So, for the same amount as you’d pay for a registrar to come to a hotel or other registered venue, you can have a unique and 100% personalised ceremony that will never be repeated. YOU choose the mood and feel of your ceremony, by your song/music choices, venue, readings, symbols/rituals, and together we work to create a ceremony that is all about you as a couple.
Ask any wedding planner in a registered hotel/venue what a registrar-led service is like, and if they’re honest, they’ll tell you this: they can repeat the script word for word because they’re all the same. So, is that really what you want for your wedding day? Whether you’re on a low-budget wedding or spending thousands, surely the ceremony (the heart of your wedding day) should reflect your love, your values and your hopes.
To me, personally and professionally, what makes a ceremony beautiful is when the authenticity of the couple’s love is given the space, word medicine and ritual to be openly expressed in front of their gathered friends and family. They have the freedom to be wholly themselves, and there is no restriction on this whether that is due to time, venue, script, symbolism or other. A beautiful wedding ceremony allows each person present to fully feel themselves standing in the shoes (or barefoot if in a meadow or on a beach!) of the bride and groom. It’s when the bride and groom feel safe to intimately share their deepest feelings about their loved one. They are held, energetically, within the love of their nearest and dearest, as they say their vows, take their rings or have their hands bound.
When all these things come together, that is when you will hear guests say: that was so beautiful.
Veronika Robinson is an independent celebrant in Cumbria. She loves officiating weddings, and remembers each one she officiates. Veronika has been officiating weddings and handfastings since 1995 when she lived in New Zealand. You can contact her at Ceremonies from the Heart www.veronikarobinson.com/celebrant #Cumbria #weddings #weddingsincumbra #cumbrianweddings
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