The words death and café conjure such different images, don’t they? The idea of placing them alongside each other evokes confusion or curiosity, but rarely is the response neutral. Grief, pain, torment, shock, loss, heartbreak, endings, finality. Cappuccino, cake, tea, scones, taste sensation, pleasure, companionship, joviality. How on earth do you link […]
Is ‘running off in secret’ something couples do to avoid dealing with complicated relations, permission, expensive commercialised wedding days and high-level stress or is the shrouding of the event in secrecy a form of magical intimacy? Culturally we’ve been somewhat conditioned to believe it’s rather anti-social behaviour, and often done in haste, but I would […]
Is the closing of curtains a vital ritual in the cremation service or an out-of-date tradition? A fundamental aspect of being a funeral celebrant is the ability to listen the needs and wishes of the chief mourner. One of the questions that we must ask, for those planning a cremation service, is “Do you want […]
Some of the oldest rituals transcend time because, when words can no longer express our deepest needs, we turn to the art of storytelling by imagery. This allows deeply significant symbolism to embed into our psyche. It’s akin to dropping an archetypal-rich anchor deep into an artesian basin to draw up ancestral wisdom and […]
As a specialist in handfasting ceremonies, I find it hypocritical (at best) and moneymaking (at worst) for humanist celebrants to officiate wedding ceremonies which include the ritual of handfasting. Why? Firstly, humanists denounce a belief in anything connected to deities. They are, in short, self-identified atheists or agnostics. A handfasting is a beautiful and ancient […]
In ancient times, a ceremony was such a significant expression of a rite of passage ~ a life-changing initiation into a new way of life ~ that oftentimes they lasted for days. Such ceremonies were acknowledged by the whole community, and all daily busyness ceased so everyone could witness and participate in the ceremonial rites. […]
Training students to be Heart-led Celebrants is, in some ways, a bit like the variety to be found in the life of a working celebrant. Just as every ceremony is different and unique, so too are my students. While I am aware of all the material we need to cover during their time with me, the direction […]
Do you remember that power ballad by Bonnie Tyler called Holding Out For a Hero? She sings ‘where have all the good men gone?’ Those lyrics went through my head as I lay awake most of last night and the night before, tossing and turning like a volatile tornado ripping through buildings. One of the […]
As we descend into the darker days and nights here in the Northern Hemisphere, that tendency to go into hibernation mode is amplified. If ever there’s a word for change, it’s Autumn. The expansive vibrance of long, stretched-out Summer days and evenings has now long waned into the Turn of the Wheel… How […]
Silence is golden, my mother often used to say to me. I see now that it was code for the fact I talked too much as a child! Kahlil Gibran, the Lebanese poet, wrote in his book The Prophet: “You talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts; And when you can […]